I Can Watch This Show But Not Tonight

Fun exciting times when you almost fall asleep driving home, have a double espresso when you get home, and then try to watch a TV show but can’t even make it ten minutes in before giving up. This is the second TV show I have given up on in as many nights. The first was because it was an interesting concept quickly abandoned and turned into a soap opera and the second was because I’m just too tired.

I think I can watch this one though. I’m not stopping because it was bad. I’m stopping because I am just so tired I need to go to sleep, and I do not know why. Or maybe I do. Physically I shouldn’t be tired but I know from working with animals that mental stimulation leads to fatigue far more than physical stimulation and right now we are full of mental strain.

The business is growing again. I realized on the drive home that I have let contact with a client linger for too long and that there is someone else I keep putting off calling and need to badly. We had a stressful day yesterday due to things beyond or control and I decided we had to go to the aquarium to stand in the tunnel only it was extremely crowded and there was no peace to be had.

We are preparing for our boys birthday party this weekend and tomorrow is their birthday. It might be that the body remembers all the stress of two years ago. Of their birth thirteen weeks early and everything that followed. It might be that our own trip is coming up in a week and a half and getting and keeping everything in order is tiring and trying. I do not know why I am at this level of exhaustion only that I am.

I can’t explain it. I shouldn’t be this tired. I slept well last night, woke up at a reasonable time, and had a good relaxing day. We went to the aquarium, did some work, I read for a bit, and then tried to settle in to watch an episode of a TV show. It looked like a good one, but after ten minutes and one gin and tonic I was done. It was bedtime and I couldn’t stay awake.

I also don’t know why the episode had to be an hour long. I decided to watch a TV show because I didn’t want something movie length and here we are with an episode 30 minutes short of being a movie. It isn’t anybody’s fault. That’s how they do first episodes. The show looked decent. It’s about aliens or something and talking to them or something. I didn’t quite catch it all. I was too tired, and now it really is time to fall into bed and get to tomorrow.

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